I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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