I only kidnapped one of them. chill
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
