Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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