yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
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