Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Randomize
