she was so not down for the gang bang
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
