Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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