Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize