so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I have already put on my inside pants.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
