Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
