I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
