i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
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