actually, I'm a sock model
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
