from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
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