My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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