im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
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