Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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