he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
