brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
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