Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
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