I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
