Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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