that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
