This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
