i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
