Well douche your snatch and let's go!
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
