wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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