I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
