respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
