hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
