Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
You know how most people would take your keys when they don't want you to leave a party? Those 2 girls aren't most people. They took my pants instead.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
So here I am, sexting at work.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
Randomize
