that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
