thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
hotel room ftw
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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