You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
