You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Damn victory sex feels great
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