guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Randomize
