oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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