just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
