I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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