we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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