pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
