He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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