Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
love makes seman taste better
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
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