we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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