Don't you send me to vm
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
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