I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
