oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Randomize
