i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I looked at my own cervix.
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
