Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize