Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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